Finding Nora Read online

  “Don’t leave me again.” He pulled away from her and buried his face in the crook of her neck. “Talk to me first. Please don’t leave again.”

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered, holding him in place and rubbing along his back. “I won’t.”

  “Ack! Gah!” a surprised voice cried out. Tyler, one of Cai’s clients from the youth center where he worked, shielded his eyes. “I thought you were Cai’s girlfriend! What the fuck?”

  Whatever he may have thought, he continued his trek to the coffee maker, albeit peeking through his fingers.

  “She is.” Cai followed him into the kitchen, walking right over to her and bending down to kiss her cheek while she stood in the circle of Apollo’s embrace.

  “Oh really?” He sipped his coffee. “Interesting. Do tell.” He examined the kitchen. “Why the hell don’t you have a table? Where am I supposed to sit?”

  When she would have shifted away from him, Apollo held her in place, dropping a kiss on her head before allowing her to leave. She reached for her shake with nervous hands.

  “You don’t have to explain it to me,” Tyler chuckled. “But Dr. Murray is going to love it. I wish I could see his face when you explain how you have two boyfriends.”

  “She doesn’t have to tell him anything.” Apollo stood straighter, his shoulders pulling and stretching his t-shirt.

  Putting his mug on the counter, Tyler held up his hands. “No need to Hulk out, Dr. Banner.” He smirked at Nora. “It is part of your first interview. He’s going to ask a lot of intrusive questions, and I believe you’ve agreed to answer them.”

  She had.

  He’d introduced her to Dr. Daniel Murray, a psychologist at Brownington College, who ran a long-term experimental study. She agreed to participate in exchange for room and board, and free tuition at the college. At the time, she had nowhere to go.

  Last night Matisse, Apollo, Seok, Cai, and Ryan had realized they all had feelings for her and struggled with what to do next. She heard them arguing, and then fighting, and took off, not wanting to come between them. A chance run-in with Tyler led her to the doctor.

  Dr. Murray seemed kind, but demanding. In his eyes, his study took precedence over everything else. She got an amazing deal out of their agreement, since she’d never be able to afford college herself.

  It was only now, she realized she would need to pay. The cost wasn’t monetary, but she had to spill all of her secrets, tell him about her past, and answer any question he might ask.

  She’d be emotionally laid bare, and it terrified her.

  Apollo watched Tyler with an expression she’d never seen on him before, and she moved without thinking. “It’s okay,” she soothed. “I’m okay.” She focused her attention on Tyler. “I remember… It’s confidential, but I never thought.” She cleared her throat, turning to Cai, who waited patiently for her to speak. “It’s your life, too.”

  Nodding, he seemed to understand what she meant. It was one thing for her to share her secrets and personal life, but she’d be sharing a piece of the guys, and they hadn’t agreed to anything. He stepped closer, one hand flitting down her arm to entwine his fingers with hers. “I won’t hide. I’m not ashamed.”

  “No way,” Tyler interrupted. Did this kid never shut up? “That’s all kinds of cool. Two guys and one girl?”

  He tapped two fingers on each hand together. “Hashtag why choose?”

  Cai rolled his eyes, and made the same gesture. “Hashtag, shut up. Hashtag, none of your business. Hashtag, don’t make me regret this.”

  Suddenly, Tyler became serious. “No. Thank you, Cai. I mean it. I couldn’t have handled anything after yesterday. Watching Tilly…” He trailed off.

  “That was her name?” she asked. Knowing her name transformed the girl from a sad experience, to a real person, one people cared about.

  “Yes.” He nodded. “I didn’t know her well. Participants don’t interact with each other much, but I saw her around. Crossed paths when we’d shown up for our interviews, or whatever. She’d had a hard time, since…” He shook his head. “Never mind.”

  “Bonjour!” Matisse bounded into the kitchen, ignoring the tension and swooping toward her. He gave her a little tug and then dipped her, enough to be romantic, and not gasp in pain. “Good morning, ma belle.”

  Giggling, she returned his kiss. “You’ve become a lot more French lately.”

  Righting her, he stepped away. “I’ve always been French,” he scoffed. “But perhaps love has made it come out more.”

  There was no time to process what he’d said because Seok and Ryan entered behind him, and each of them kissed her heatedly.

  Seok wrapped his arms around her, turning her toward the other guys and nuzzling into her neck. “Good morning,” he whispered.

  Her eyes opened and she met Tyler’s slack-mouthed gaze. Having just taken a sip of his coffee, he choked. Cai grabbed the mug out of his hand and pounded him on the back.

  When he got himself together, he held his hand out. “I’m good. I’m good.” Peeking at her, he made a motion to do the stupid hashtag thing again, but Cai knocked his hands apart.

  “Enough, Tyler.”

  He laughed, but continued to stare at her. “I don’t know the meaning of the word, ‘enough.’” Narrowing his eyes, he moved a little bit closer. “Is that a zit?”

  three

  Scents

  THEY FINISHED BREAKFAST in the living room and then laid out plans for the day. Tyler needed to meet with Dr. Murray, and Nora had to outfit her dorm room and move in for real. The guys exchanged unhappy glances, making her think they were formulating a plan, and she’d hear their arguments later.

  Leaving them to shower, she faced a reminder of having nothing of her own. The array of manly-scented body washes were a sign she needed a job. If she wanted her own soap, she’d have to buy it, and she had zero funds at present.

  Later, she’d ask Matisse if she could write a resume on his computer, and then she’d chat with Cai. He might know of some employment agencies. Somewhere, she had a bag full of brochures she’d gotten at the homeless shelter. Shuddering, she turned up the heat. Last night, she’d had no choice but to stay at a shelter after running away.

  The hot water ran over her face and saturated her hair. She opened a bottle of body wash, sniffing to see if she could match it with one of the guys. She couldn’t help smiling as she uncapped each bottle. A knock on the bathroom door had her fumbling and then dropping it on her foot.

  “Ow! Shit! Sorry! Fuck! Come in!” She didn’t know who she was apologizing to: the bottle? Her foot?

  The door opened and Cai’s voice carried to her over the water. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” Sticking her head out of the curtain, she blinked at the water running into her eyes “What’s up?”

  Suddenly, she was very aware of her nakedness. The same thing seemed to have occurred to Cai, because he looked everywhere but at her. He spoke, but she only caught every other word with the running water and the distance between her and the door.

  “Come in. I can’t hear you.”

  Stepping inside, he shut the door behind him. “Tyler spoke to Dr. Murray and he’d like you to go in with him. He wants to speak with you today, instead of Monday.”

  “Oh. Okay.” Her stomach cramped with nervousness.

  “You don’t have to do it today, Nora. I’ll call and talk to him.”

  “No.” She shook her head, whapping herself in the face with a dreaded lock of wet hair. “It’s okay. It’s part of my contract. I’ll go in.”

  He nodded, but glanced away. The muscle in his cheek jumped, a tell-tale sign of stress. She reached out a hand, dripping water all over the floor, but couldn’t quite reach him. “It’s okay, Cai. It’ll be awkward, but I’ll be fine.”

  Seeing her hand outstretched, he took it. She craned her neck to see his face. “I thought Apollo was the tallest.”

  “He’s not.”
He continued to stare down at her, his face serious. “I’m going to kiss you.”

  The ability to speak left her and she could only nod.

  Holding tightly to her hands, he seemed satisfied with keeping their kiss chaste. At least, until she lost her footing and scrabbled for the shower curtain. Before she could rip it down, he caught her, arms wrapping around her naked back so she soaked his t-shirt.

  A deep groan left his throat, and he stepped into the shower, not caring about drenching his jeans and shirt.

  In all honesty, she didn’t care either. She loved the feel of his wet shirt against her breasts and the way she could trace the muscles in his back, outlining each one through the wet material.

  But it wasn’t enough. She needed his skin under her fingers.

  His hands traveled along her back, careful of the scrapes and stitches, until he could cup her bottom in his hands. Trying to get closer, she stood on her tip toes, mashing her chest into his and arching her hips forward. The hard length of his erection pressed against her. She turned her hand to trace it through the wet denim, and he ripped his mouth from hers to take in an audible breath.

  Her eyes opened, asking for permission. He knew what she wanted and he nodded, quickly ripping his shirt off so it landed in the tub with a slap.

  She struggled to undo the button and tug the jeans down his legs. It was nearly impossible and finally she left him to wrestle himself out. She giggled, watching him wiggle his hips to push down the material over his thighs. When he smiled at her, her heart soared.

  Cai! In a moment she would get to taste him. As soon as he managed to step out of his jeans, she kissed him again. His hands threaded through her hair, holding the wet strands away from her face and neck so he could lick and suck a path to her collarbone. He stayed a moment at the dip below her chin, licking the droplets of water pooling there.

  There was a tremor in his hands as they skimmed up and down her arms before slowly palming one of her breasts. His thumb rubbed against the tight nub of her nipple, circling around and around.

  Moaning softly, she pressed her body tighter against his. She loved the feel of his skin against hers, and must have said so, because he whispered in response, “I love the way you feel.”

  Gathering her courage, she let her hand encircle his erection. She stepped back a fraction of an inch, so she could look down at him. She wanted to see and memorize every plane and angle of his body.

  Their skin contrasted, his gold against her light brown. Hard to her soft, his muscles were carved, there was no give about him; he projected strength.

  His chest was covered in a light dusting of hair, an upside-down triangle from nipple to nipple, and down to the center of his stomach, turning gold and springy at his groin. Trailing her fingers through the curls and then lower, she cupped the heavy sac between his thighs.

  Face pained, he groaned low and quiet, as if aware anyone could hear them. His eyes were tightly closed, head tipped back, the muscles in his neck standing out as he clenched and unclenched his jaw.

  Cai was a man who didn’t like to lose control. With a small amount of pride and wickedness, she made him skate close to the edge. She massaged him, pulling gently on his balls while her teeth grazed the line of his jaw, tongue sneaking out to capture the water and rasp the dark stubble on his skin.

  His hand shot out, grabbing the balance bar while his other hand pressed into her lower back, urging her closer. She licked down the cord in his neck until she came to his shoulder, and then collarbone, sternum, and across to his nipple. She fixed her mouth on it, flicking her tongue along the tip, and then bit down.

  His entire body flinched, and then, to her utter delight, he lost control.

  “My turn,” he growled tightly, his voice promising retribution.

  But she had a strategy, and dropped to her knees, quickly taking his length in her mouth.

  “Nora…” he warned.

  As soon as his taste hit her tongue, she blissed out. She loved the way his sac tightened, coming up close to his body. Grasping his base, she massaged him. When she found she couldn’t fit him entirely in her mouth, she went about licking and sucking. She let her tongue rest under the mushroomed head, giving him short, strong strokes before pushing him as far back into her throat as she could.

  “Baby,” he groaned, but he didn’t pull away. He moved her hair out of her face. As she drew back to his tip, she peered up at him. His face was serious, but his golden eyes blazed. If they’d been in the dark, they’d glow, there was so much heat there.

  Closing her eyes, she pushed down with both her mouth and her hand, taking him as far back as she could before swallowing around him. She gagged a little, and he tried to pull back, but she grasped his hips, holding him in place. Slowly, she drew away, her hands moving around his hips until she held onto his butt. The muscles flexed, clenching and releasing as he moved in time with her mouth.

  She could almost see them in her mind. His golden skin dripping with water while she rested her on her knees, arms wrapped around him and holding him close as she bobbed up and down on his length.

  His hand clenched in her hair. “Come here,” he moaned, and pulled her off, lifting her to her feet before slamming his mouth down on hers. “Together.” He stopped kissing her, stressing how important this was to him. “Our first time. We come together.”

  She nodded, not trusting her voice. His hand went straight to her core, and he pressed a finger deep inside her curling and tapping while his palm pressed and rubbed against her clit. She struggled not to lose her rhythm. His hips flexed into her hand and she knew she was doing the same. She wanted to get closer and closer, and then he whispered, “Now, Nora.”

  She was right there, right with him on the precipice. Her body responded to him, tightening and clenching around his finger. He pulsed in her hand, growing harder. His rhythm stuttered and then the hot jet of his release, warmer than the water, splashed against her stomach.

  Reluctantly, he left her body, dragging his fingers slowly out of her, tracing her slit and then grasping her hand. He twined their fingers together, kissing her tirelessly, the porcelain of the shower cool at her back.

  “Baby,” he whispered against her lips, embracing her, and burying his face in her neck. He inhaled once, deeply, and then again. “You know what?”

  She shook her head against his chest, unable to formulate a thought, let alone a word at that moment.

  “We need to buy you your own soap. You smell like Apollo.”

  Giggling, she pulled away from him to look up. He was completely at ease now, relaxed in a way she hadn’t seen before.

  “You okay?”

  He smiled, nodding, and leaned down to kiss her again.

  four

  Meeting

  WHEN NORA WALKED downstairs with Cai, ready to meet Dr. Murray, the boys were watching a movie. They all looked exhausted. Apollo slept, his mouth hanging open, and his glasses perched low on his nose. Matisse watched the tv with bleary-eyed boredom, but when he caught her looking, he winked, patting the space next to him.

  “I can’t,” Nora whispered, pointing toward the door. “I have to go.”

  He made a move to stand, but Ryan beat him to it, waving him back down.

  Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, Cai kissed the side of her head. “I’ll see you when you get back,” he said before taking Ryan’s spot on the couch.

  “I got this.” Seok came in from the dining room, keys in hand.

  “Thank you.” Ryan slumped. “I’m a little afraid I’ll fall asleep if I drive, but I still look better than those guys.” He gestured over his shoulder at the other three boys before leaning down to kiss her cheek. Yawning, he squeezed her arm and returned to the living room.

  “You suck,” he groaned at someone.

  “Sit with Matisse,” Cai answered. “I’m not moving, and he wanted company.”

  “Not his!”

  “They’ll
be fine,” Seok reassured her.

  “Call us!” Cai called out.

  “What the fuck, dude?!” He must have woken Apollo.

  “We need to go before it gets ugly.” Taking her hand, Seok led her outside and down the steps, past the cars and down the driveway. “Mind walking?”

  She shook her head. Dr. Murray wanted to meet on campus, but not at Converse Hall, thank God. If she walked into the building today, she’d stare at the spot Tilly died. Instead, they headed in the direction of the counseling center, located way at the other end of campus.

  “Is Tyler meeting us there?” she asked after they crossed the street.

  “He had to go earlier.” He squinted against the sunshine. “He might be there when we get there. I’m not sure.”

  They walked across the campus green, past the fountain where a reporter cornered Matisse and her, and Ethan Allen Chapel where they’d run for sanctuary. Content with their silence, Nora enjoyed the scenery.

  She never thought she and Seok would be doing this. When she’d run away the other night, it’d been partly because of him, and the way he made her head spin. He could be cold and dismissive, and then in the next moment, passionate and caring.

  Thinking about the moments they’d shared before she left made her blush. He overwhelmed her.

  “Are you all right?” She’d paused and he turned to her, worried. “Do you hurt? Do we need to stop?”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I was just thinking.”

  He waited, one eyebrow raised. When she didn’t answer right away, he led her to one of the park benches nearby. Pushing her hair back from her face, he leaned in close to her. Her eyelids fluttered close and he pressed a kiss on each one. “What were you thinking about, Nora?” he asked, his breath drifting across her skin.

  “Us,” she answered, opening her eyes.

  His pupil expanded like he was in a darkened room. One hand tangled in her hair, and he kissed her. The tight grip he had in her hair was at odds with the gentleness of his kisses. They were delicate, but she pressed into him, desperate for more, something to ease the ache he built inside her.